Hello. Yes spent some time the studio this morning. Discovered upon examination that what I did yesterday wasn't so bad. A wise person said "Paintings come from painting" For me it is the continuity of work. Working regularly enough that it is familiar, that's what makes the work flow and gives results for me.
I feel like writing something bitchy and as I have, dare I flatter myself a very small audience it is harmless. And ultimately better to write privately than talk about it. Here we go. There is a local "Art Critic" who writes a weekly column in a paper and in every "review" she refers to herself in this manner. "This Critic feels...". or "Blah, blah, blah...for this critic." I find it so annoying that even if she says something worthwhile it gets lost by always reminding everyone that she is a critic. First of all it is a lofty job description that some might dispute but that is not for me to say. This artist does not judge. Right.
Back to painting. There I do judge and I am the harshest on myself. This is not uncommon I realize and wish that made it easier but alas I am cruel to the bone. It's the built in forgetter that never runs low on batteries. More often than I care to realize I feel that the work is shit, shaking in my shoes about what comes next. Almost always feeling differently, pleased, the next session when reviewing what I'd done. Or I can feel like a fraud, and, in five minutes a genius.
I once went to a lecture co-incidentally by one of the more well know NY Art Critics and He said some things that really hit home in a not-so-flattering way, re: artists. I wish I could quote but this is the gist. Artists are the most self-indulgent people. He prefaced by saying He loves them of course. They think everything they do is brilliant. Well that's the idea. He is right, but at the same time they might be too.
One thing that might be the most helpful thing for me to remember is that there is no right or wrong way to do what I do. Maybe.