High Line Open Studios 09

Hello. This is the image that will be in the members' show for the High Line Open Studio Tour. Thanks to Randi Goldsmith who carried the painting back to NYC for me.

It is late and I must go to sleep but tomorrow will collect my thoughts and post something worth reading.

in the light of day...

Hello. I've had this image on my desktop for a while. I found it on the internet and thought it would be a beautiful blog post image. I don't know who did it - would love to give a credit. I'll have to check into it or remove it.

Well things do look different. I won't be so judgemental (right I've honed that skill for years now) as to say worse but let's say in need of some attention. I have to remember that this style f painting for me is new and with it comes challenges and not everything will be pleasing right away and some things need to be lived with, tolerated for a while. Get the $&*# over it and move on....that is why you have created five work stations so you can move on and let things be for a while.

Later. Errands to do, can't wait to get back in the studio.

High Line Open Studios 09

Plug for www.highlineopenstudios09.org http://www.highlineopenstudios09.org/Map/Mondo.html
calling all chelsea area artists.

Hello. So I just finished making my fifth 96"x96" MDF surface to make paintings on. As I think I've said this stuff is heavy, and threatening, I won. Had a little help from friend Haim standing it up and done, five stations, Of course one could say, now you've done it, You've made a big studio and there is pressure, you must produce now. But I will ignore that boring voice (as it's in my head) and move on. Not so bad really. As a matter of fact pretty amazing my only complaint is the brief amount of time. Who let her in??

So happy that I picked a different cloud image from the header of the blog. duh. So I am car-less and Haim took my show down for me. He called and said that He would do it and I said OK thank you. Cut to my show is down and the paintings are in the foyer and they did me proud. I'm going to wrap them up and bring them to the city for hopefully another audience. It is bittersweet and as a group no one was interested in any of them, to own that is. Granted not a huge audience I have to ask myself....well maybe I do not have to question. Just let that go, My overall response has been positive and I can't deny the way I feel about these paintings. I saw a painting by a young woman doing large drip paintings with a definite mood. It was great but it was to much like what I am doing in one way. We both could have done that painting is what I'm trying to say. Anyway, There's room for many voices and right now if I check in with myself in the studio and focus and paint I will make something that is mine. Cause I'm fifty.

new day new post

Hello.

This painting is by Michael Raedecker, a painter whose show I saw in Chelsea, I googled Him and found a couple of paintings. His work is very sensitive yet powerful. There is some needlepoint-like work involved in the pictures but they are anything but dainty. They seem to have everything for me as a viewer. There is the architectural rendering style yet there is no mistaking them for an architectural plan. I am pretty sure that I posted a bunch of His images on my blog in the past now that I think of it. I love His work but the bottom line is that I need to have access to my main computer and all of my images. It appears that the cable that I need to transfer is out in the country and I hope so because I do not want to buy another one. This is where the blog can get dangerously boring, It is early in the morning I haven't finished my first cup of coffee and I am trying to put together a thought. It all started with looking at this post from last night and seeing a typo in the first line.

Tomorrow I head back to EH and to the stores and painting. I am happy to say that I am not taking care of a pet. That would be too much. It has been a long time since I've had a pet. The last was Alexx, a Tabby Cat, handsome, brown tiger with a dark face and beautiful eyes. He lived to be sixteen and somehow He became diabetic the last five or six years of so of His life. We were very close, and I was there for Him and with Him at the end. He touched many people, the women loved Him. He would sleep at the foot of my easel. He was born like me in Providence, RI. I realize His bio is not in sequence but this is just the beginning of His story. He really was my Hero. I photographed Him in Black and White just before He died and He looked beautiful, His coat was always perfect. I think He died in 2000, I am not sure. I may still have one or two of His empty prescription containers, a ball or two and one doctor's receipt.

I adopted Him against my will actually but He was definitely my cat from the start. He was three - four months old and was cross-eyed and cute and we clicked. He immediately became sick and that Sunday my mother and I took Him to Warwick Animal Hospital where He was diagnosed with Upper Respiratory Disease and would have stopped eating and drinking for some reason. That was my understanding anyway and I force fed and drugged Him, He improved right away and we connected permanently. He was crazy and fabulous. I wish I could google Him.

Early this morning John dropped me at Sixth and 28Th while He was rushing to the airport and while walking home I met two cats in storefronts that were so sweet, they were both clean and let me pet them and loved the attention. It was a nice moment and I found myself thinking about a cat at home for two seconds and got my senses back. I'm still in morning I guess that is true, He was a special pet.

I think I've mentioned that I'm preparing two new 96"x96" panels for paintings, for a total of five work stations. The fifth being purchased and put together tomorrow. Is that excessive? Maybe but I just feel like it will allow me to make more work and make twin large paintings at the same time. Listen I'm going to be fifty, I'll do what I want.

today is the first day.....

Hello. Can't resist another pic of the legendary Judy Garland. She died at 47 and had a very tough time in life. A star from the age of three and for most of that a commodity to many businessmen. I found this photo on the Internet and if there was ever any doubt as to her ability as an actress I think this puts it to rest. I think there are more stories in her eyes than many that adorn the silver screen. Spoken like a true film/theatre queen. I flatter myself thinking I'm a modern day Addison Dewitt. If there are any young readers out there in the dark, following me, right, go, rush and get yourself a copy of "All About Eve" and while you are at it "Sunset Boulevard" Gay yes, camp yes but also brilliant, gorgeous film experiences.

What follows is a bit of my scattered, not-so-edited thinking, enter at own risk.

Amazing how the the mind works one day up next day down. It's such a delicate balance. Today I am much better, feeling really optimistic. Of course I feel like a spoiled child but I have to remember that the creative person inside is a child and that is what I'm trying to nurture. Some would say get the %#^& over it and get a job and more often then not I agree but today I am handling myself with kid gloves.

I was reminded last night of my accomplishments regarding showing work in the past couple of years and it is amazing how easy it is to forget, in this "it's what you are doing now that matters" world. It is so easy to forget while trying to move forward and moving forward is crucial but not if it is only about more, bigger, better. I would like to slow the pace down and be more in the moment enjoying the process. If not what does it all mean? Who cares about making another painting for paintings sake? I know the value of art to the human psyche it's a mystery how important it can be and the feelings that art can provoke. I guess sometimes I can forget which should be a reminder to back up and remember why I do it. Of course reasons change over the years. As a child in a chaotic home my creative abilities were mine and made me special, kept me focused. Thinking about how it's changed, it really hasn't. I guess with age and experience the feelings making art can invoke, for me, are deeper in a different, more informed way. I'm still a delicate flower underneath the leathery exterior.

An old friend used to joke that his mother gave him three words of advice, Moisturize, Moisturize, Moisturize. I think that is funny.

Having the experience of my first three shows in the past couple of years has been quite a ride. I've made the work right up till the deadline of the show. Maybe that is common but going forward with the momentum that I have creatively, I look forward to the next show being about selecting work that is finished, dry and ready. My recent show at Surface Library Gallery www.surfacelibrary.com had work that was so new at installation that some of it was wet. I arranged the show around an idea, I made the work and then later found this new direction, it seemed so exciting that everything else seemed old and it was all I wanted to show. Not necessarily bad news mind you but a little crazy and made of some very frantic days running my expensive little mom & pop business of prepping, creating, stretching, and installing.

I hoping my next show is more organic. I feel I've found a new direction that isn't an "idea" for a show. Till now I've thought about ideas for the show, how the work will relate and/or be cohesive. I also feel that I am in a rhythm with work that is much more consistent. Instead of working and then a couple of months before feeling like I am running a triathlon to make a show. Me, Me, Me.

This good friend and I were talking and He reminded me of where I was two years ago compared with today and what an amazing journey. He told me that I am lucky because at fifty, ouch, and being healthy and fit I have the next ten years to really explore and make some of my best work. I remember being twenty and having this friend, an older woman, Mary Kosowski (we painted together regularly, she was/is an amazing drafts person in the style of Degas, she taught me so much) tell me that she was a little envious that my creative journey was just beginning. I knew what she meant then and certainly now but I feel lucky because I would not trade my vision for that of a twenty year old. Many have made their most important work very late in life. It makes sense that life's experiences would bring more to ones work.

I think I have an interested sublet who happens to be a very clean, chic guy from San Francisco. If it works out I will be very happy.

Later.

I will move on.

One of my heroine's Judy Garland. A true artist who just wanted to give. Of course the problem was that she gave to much and had nothing left. One could argue that she would not have been the exciting talent that she was had she held back and taken better care of herself. I would like to have a less tragic memory of such a wonderful woman, but that is life.

In the words and memory of Elaine Stritch. After an evening of both of them preforming their shows and at a bar till the wee hours of the morning Judy said:

"Alaine I never thought I'd say this but Good Night" ( not an exact quote, but close.)

Hello.

in nyc

Hello. I am in the city for the first time in a while and it feels great. I have many plans for getting things done in the apartment. Listening to a fascinating radio program about gold and the fascination with gold.

www.highlineopenstudios09.org Attention all artists with studios in the Chelsea area check it out.

This is the beach on Fire Island taken the summer that John and I met. We spent a few beautiful days with Michael on the beach.

I have some assistance with linking up with some other artists for the High Line Studio Tour in my hood. Very excited. Can I just repeat that I love my blog and the whole idea of writing for writings sake. After all I'm not really saying much just thoughts in the moment but it feels great and in some way connecting.

Later. just checking in.